rollercoasters, but not quite death

I absolutely love rollercoasters. Amusement parks like Magic Mountain are honestly my favorite places to go other than the beach. The thrill and the adrenaline that get me going help me to experience highs that I feed off of. Recently I was able to go to just an amusement park to get my fill of rollercoasters with Jessica Sorenson, but it wasn’t like any that I have ever been to. After waiting in line for Viper for what seemed like forever and a day, we finally got up to the front. It was a little odd that each rider had to check in at a front reception desk before allowed to go through the gate to the actual ride and even odder still that once we checked in, the receptionist told us that we needed to go downstairs to make our own parachutes before we were allowed on the ride. So, why is it that we need parachutes again? Jessica was a little reluctant to ride such a ride, but I assured her that they wouldn’t let us go on the ride with homemade parachutes unless it was safe. Um, right?

We went down the stairs and found ourselves in the basement of my fraternity house. I saw all of my brothers’ “decorations” strew about and we started sifting through their messy rooms looking for suitable, parachutable materials. Since there was a heaping pile of dirty laundry and blankets in the middle of the floor, this was the obvious choice in order to make safe parachutes. I had no idea what I was doing, so I shoved the entire pile toward Jess and got her some dental floss to stitch it all together. In a whirlwind of scissors cutting, scraps of shirts and blankets flying, and dental flossed, needle-threaded stitching, our parachutes started turning out pretty nice. Within minutes our parachutes were ready and I was feeling pretty confident about riding this new rollercoaster. Jessbugs on the other hand, was not. I kind of recall something about listening to women because they have better judgement, but can’t really remember the exact quote right now, so I will not relate it.

Either way, Bugs and I headed back upstairs to get on the ride. We were about to walk through the gate when the park manager stopped us. He told us that they had just closed the ride and were not going to be reopening it for a very long time. Something about having an “accident,” decapitation, broken bones, and death; I think. Jess let out a huge sigh of relief and I was totally bummed. She was glad that we were not on that last run and I was visibly upset that we didn’t make the last run. I mean, not everyone died on that last run, so we probably would have been fine and would have gotten to ride the rollercoaster before they closed it down for good. Besides, what better stories and bragging rights than to have ridden Viper on the very last run ever? She could tell that I wasn’t happy that we had to wait in line for so long without me getting my adrenaline kick and knew that the only thing to make me feel better, because it always does, was food. So Jess, being the kind and loving person that she is, took me to the snack bar to treat me to some of that delicious amusement park lemonade. It did make me feel a little better, but I sure wished I could have ridden Viper one last time.