Thursday, June 12, 2008

awkward

Just wanted to relay a very awkward situation that I was in recently. I was guarding at the porch in Newport (21st street for those of you who do not know.) I had a note that I had written to Stephanie Leupold, the President of my company's wife, explaining my feelings about Guy Dickson. I had them in the pocket of some shorts I was holding while wading out in the water and I heard her call to me, so I decided to throw the shorts to her and let her get the note out. The shorts landed on the ground right by her, but some other man picked up the shorts. When I looked, I saw that it was Guy and he was dancing around not giving up the shorts. He pulled the note out and read it, then handed it to her looking dejected. I had gotten out of the water and was sitting at my "tower" again, when he came over to ask me if I wanted some ice cream and if he could have a hug. Can you say "awkward?"

adventures in croatia

For those of you who have never hot-air ballooned before, I highly recommend it. My best friend Jason took me on a hot-air balloon trip to Croatia and the views were spectacular. As we floated effortlessly over the national parks and lakes, we could see the sea in the distance. Upon seeing a busy little stretch of coast, we decided to land and check out the scene. I think Jason is much better at flying the hot-air balloon than landing it because we over shot our target and ran into a fence when landing. When we landed our balloon, we had to check into the country at the local government building that was no more than the back of a trailer. They told us that we had to catch a boat to the only island that had the authority to issue visa's, so out we header. We decided to swim to the island because it would be that much more adventurous and began the swim (it was only a couple miles anyway.) Halfway through the swim the boat drove by and we hitched a ride because we had already had our fill. Down the channel we speed, turning between tiny islands with the wind on our bare scalps, racing the other boats for fun, until we saw the island that we were headed to. There was a ramp in the water right before the island that water-skiers used to launch off of and we were headed right toward it!

We hit the jump at full speed and flew into the air. We had at least four seconds of hang-time and landed back in the water with a thud. I turned to give Jason a high-five, but he had gotten tossed out of the boat and the boat was not slowing. It pulled up to the island and I got off to get my visa, figuring that Jason would just swim in. There were all sorts of colorful characters there. There were African tribes people, a whole herd of elementary school kids, the circus act with all of their animals, and random people dressed up in Mardi Gras and Halloween attire. It was quite a scene. Deciding that this would be better to experience with Jason, I went to sit under the shade of a tree while waiting for him to swim in. The beaches and the water were lovely that day and I cannot wait to go back. I will probably make my way back there some day. Who knows, maybe I will go next week!

boring

Yesterday I was surfing with Ber. We sat there as stared at the ocean as a 15 minute lull passed us by without a single wave. I turned and saw a lifeguard trunk parked at the 36th street tower, so I paddled in to say hello. I said hello and then we just stood there looking at Lake Newport.

I never said that my life wasn't boring at times.

back in the day of cdm polo

For those of you who played water polo, do you remember those 5.30am workouts? Pulling into the high school parking lot when it was still dark out. Seeing SAABs with "Fly Girls" stickers on them. Watching me pull up on my motorcycle with sidecar, oh so coolly? Going into the team room in our speedos and huddling on the floor to keep warm, while breathing in the mildewed, chlorinated carpet, just waiting for Vargas to come in and yell at us?

I remember it like it was this morning.

yellow tar ... is that contagious?

Driving in torrential downpour has never been my favorite. I just do not feel comfortable driving as fast as I see some when it is coming down really hard. The last time it rained that hard, I was driving away from work on MacArthur past the Bluffs. I was watching the rain dump on my windshield and saw it dancing with my wipers. Seeing the lights through the rain was very beautiful, but very dangerous. There was a motorcycle beside me and I thought that this guy must be crazy riding in the rain.

As we pulled onto the 73 on-ramp the water pooled and got very deep all of a sudden. The motorcyclist had pulled in front of me and laid down his bike right in front of me. I did not have room to swerve or time to react and I drove right over him! Luckily, his bike went to the side, so it did not scratch my Mini. I stopped and got out of the car right when another car crashed in front of me. There were hoards of people climbing up the bridge to see the accident in front of me, so I ran over to see what was happening there. A doctor had pulled the man out of his car and recoiled in horror shouting, "Get back! Get back! This man has a deadly strain of the Yellow Tar!" Now, I have no idea what that is, but I definitely do not want it.

landon outside work

I just found out that Landon has magical super powers! I called his house line in Utah from my office to chat yesterday, so I knew that he was in Utah. I was bummed that yet again he was down here and we did not get to go surfing or hang out this past weekend. Literally two minutes after we hung up, I walked downstairs to the street and as I walked past the driveway to my parking lot, I see Landon kicking it in his car. So, there is the proof. He can either fly REALLY fast or he has the power to teleport. Which one is it? I would really like to know and how can I get some of those powers? Seriously.

mirror fight with ashton kutcher over katie holms

I must have had a rough night last night, because it is all seeming very hazy and I am having trouble remembering exactly what happened. All I know is that I was eating at a Mexican restaurant with my mom enjoying dinner. The mariachi band was playing and we had the most delicious fajitas. We were just eating and talking, laughing and generally having a good time. The horchata tasted a little funny and when I got to the bottom of my drink there was a little raffle ticket saying that I had won a free dinner that night! This was great, as free food is almost always better than food that you pay for, but like they say, "there is no such thing as a free lunch."

We left the restaurant and I started feeling really sick. I think that whatever the raffle ticket was made of had dissolved into my drink and was making me a little delirious. I walked into some building and saw Katie Holmes sitting there and in my delirious state, went up to hit on her. I was making some great progress and had her eating out of the palm of my hands, laughing at all my jokes, when Ashton Kutcher came over and told me that was his girl. I told him to back off and he did not like that at all. He pushed me, so I pushed him back and he slammed against a mirror, shattering it to the floor. We both picked up shards of mirror and started slashing at each other. How barbaric! All this over stupid Katie Holmes. We slashed and punched, kicked and bit. This went on for so long that we were both exhausted, bloodied, sweaty, and breathing heavy. I still was not feeling up to par and was lucky to have held him off, even getting so good jabs of my mirror into his side. As we paused, we talked and decided that she was not worth it, so we shook hands and went home. I am not sure if I am still sick or if it is the stab wound, but I me stomach still hurts.

crystal orb

My friend Tyson and I were walking by a construction site when we saw some very shady characters discussing two crystal orbs that they were holding with shifty eyes. We decided that they must have stolen them, because what would construction workers be doing with ancient-looking crystal orbs that definitely have magical powers, anyway? So, we sneaked into the site and lifted those two orbs, high-tailing it out of there. One of the construction workers saw us on our way out and gave chase. I remember running so hard, but it did not seem like I was getting anywhere. I pushed it a little harder and broke away just enough as I turned down the street, losing both him and Tyson.

I was now in a neighborhood that looked really nice and had driveways that went up to each of the houses, but the next street was a long way up. I had a feeling that the construction worker would get in his car to catch us, so I ducked into one of the driveways to hide. I saw Tyson running up, so I called out to him to come hide with me. Not more than 10 seconds later, the worker drove by, pulled into a driveway down the street, turned around, and drove back. As he passed us for the second time, I felt relieved and for the first time, took a good look at my orb. It was elliptical and had little crosses etched on the inside. It really was a thing of beauty. A little cloudy, but it somehow reflected so much light that it seemed to glow.

We were getting ready to get up and run again, when the construction worker drives back up the street towards us in a van this time. He drops two people off at every driveway (don't ask me how he got all those people in that van), who would start looking for us. The van pulls into our driveway and when the sliding door opened, two girls jumped out and grabbed us. I was struggling and about to get away, when through the opened sliding door, I see Mikey sitting there. He was part of the search party and just knowing that he was one of them, the "bad guys," just broke my spirits. I gave up and let them take me. Mikey, your treachery has broken my heart.

back in high school

I always thought that it would be really cool to change high schools halfway through. New friends, new experiences, and a new image would be very exciting to create. I found myself experiencing just this when I transfered to Newport Harbor my Senior year. That first day at school I wandered the halls looking for my first period class, not realizing that they had a "home room." I eventually figured it out and found the Kim and Ber were in my home room, which was so choice! I walk up to them and sit down, happy to be among friends, when I hear Kim relating a story to Ber. She finishes by dropping an F-bomb and both Ber and I look at each other surprised, chuckling nervously. We were saved by the bell and just dropped it, leaving without a comment.

We went out into the parking lot by my car and I changed for swimming. I put on a black sheer Euro-thong because I thought it would make me swim faster. Berley walked by and stopped when she saw my new speedo, commenting that if I wanted to start out my year at a new school on a good note, I had better get changed out of this banana hammock. I think she is very wise.

foray into architectural art

I hate being late for class. I hate being late for anything. I always try to show up places early, but this particular day I just could not make it on time. I had an architectural art class that was located in the back "shop" area of an architectural firm. Usually, we walk through the front reception area to the back shop. I like to talk to the cute receptionists, but today there was just no time to do that. I went around the side of the building, to enter the back door, past all the heavy machinery and joined the group in looking at something our instructor was demonstrating. I took my place right next to Charity.

The instructor directed our attention to the ground, where he had a tiled layout. The tiles were all semi-wishbone shaped, but a little fatter. Then he showed us some mathematical formulas, with the tiles sketched out. There were fulcrums and degrees, with lengths and measurements. Then, as we watched the tiles, half began to rotate in unison, then they would stop and the other half would rotate. I could not understand how they all spun together because at no point in their rotation, was there any empty space between tiles. All the students were in awe and the instructor just stood there smiling. Charity, always having to be the smart one, started explaining how this was possible because of the alternating rotations and specific degrees, throwing in some Calculus jargon. I called her out on some of it that could not be true, citing the Pythagorean theorem. She countered by reciting pi to the 38th decimal and I shot back with Bayes theorem. Charity hit me with Markovitz, so I got her back with McCallum. The class and the instructor stood in complete wonderment at our sheer genius when we concluded that the debate had ended in a stalemate and that we were both right. We were much to smart for this class, so we left to start our own architectural art firm, but first went to discuss the details over some caramels.

swimming at the ool

Growing up with Brooke and Landon was a blast. I still remember bending hangers and using them to try to catch rabbits by their house. I had a blast from the past the other day, as I went and visited Landon at his house for a pool party. I walked in through the garage and every room in the house was exactly as I remembered. Even the pictures on the walls had not changed. It was nostalgic and comforting to be back in an old friends house. I walked up the steps to the pool and saw the party in full swing. There was a DJ and people running all over the place. It was really nice to hang out with Landon again because I hardly ever see him anymore. We reminisced about the last pool party when I cracked my head open on his water slide. Good times!

After all the catch up, I really had to pee. I stood at the edge of the pool and dropped my board shorts to pee. Only after did I notice the sign that said, "Welcome to our ool ... notice that there is no 'P' in it. Let's keep it that way!" Jessica came up to me to cover me up with a towel and gave me a big hug. Apparently, she did not think it was appropriate to be exposed in public, as I was, but then again, I do not think that she was wearing anything under her towel either. As the party wrapped up, we all went to Landon's pool house for "tree of life" showers. Ah, the misty, water-color memories.

where is ... the baby?

Time seriously flies. I cannot believe that all in the past year my good friend Sadie divorced, we dated, got married, AND had a baby. We have always been very close and even dated before our respective marriages. When she went through her divorce, I was there to console her and help her through it. I guess the spark was reignited because things happened very fast after that.

After work one day last week, I went to my parents house because Sadie was hanging out with my mom doing some art project. I walked in and said hello, kissing my wife, but noticed that our baby was not there. Inquiring, I asked, "Where is ... the baby?" For the life of me, I could not recall my child's name. I was searching and searching. I thought that I must be a terrible father if I cannot even remember my own child's name, but no matter how hard I tried, I could not come up with it. Oh, the look that Sadie gave me when I called it "the baby!"

I decided that I would rather go play with my friends instead of hanging around getting "the eye," so I drove down to see my friends at some random park. I noticed that there were a couple of yellow cars down the street and remembered this for later when we would leave, so that I could beat everybody at "Yellow car, I win" (the best game ever.) We all chatted for a while and when it was time to leave, the only person that jumped in my car was Galina. I drove away with her, called the yellow cars, and subsequently realized that the Russian did not play the greatest of all games, so I turned around a dropped her back off at the park. My friends all decided that they wanted to skate over to the Dover church building to play some basketball. President Slater was there leading the pack and I honestly just wanted to see him skate. I started bombing the hill by the park, picking up a lot of speed, when I realized that I did not have my sliding gloves on and I was fast approaching a four-way stop. The light turned red, so I went down and slid on my bare hands. When I stood, I was unscathed. Good thing too, because I am sure that I would have gotten an earful had I come home all cut up, still forgetting my baby's name.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

recursion

In case you do not already know, I have been studying for my CFA (Chartered Financial Analyst) exam for the past six months. Basically, I get to the office at 8 in the morning, work until 5.30 in the evening, and then I bust out the books until 12.30 in the morning. Then I get to go home, sleep very briefly, and come back in to work to repeat it all over again.

Last night was no different. There I was studying in my office and JOLT! I totally twitched, waking myself up. I was still in my office when I woke up and I was still studying. It was then that I realized I was dreaming that I was studying in my office, when I actually was. How incredibly bizarre, I was thinking, until POOF! I woke up again, still in my office studying. No, no, no, no, no. This cannot possibly be. Was I just dreaming that I fell asleep while studying, only to have a dream about myself studying, then waking up to realize that it was a dream and not even know that I was still, in fact, dreaming; only to awake one more time, snapping back to reality, and discover that I was dreaming that I was dreaming? Man, this is really making my head hurt! TWITCH! OK, I know that you and I are both confused as it is and I know that I should not be adding another, but please keep in mind that this is not my intention. I cannot help it if my dream was recursed three layers deep, but that was indeed what happened. I was dreaming that I was dreaming that I was dreaming.

I need more sleep and need to study more. Too bad those two are mutually exclusive activities.

did you read my first post?